The "Blog"

Also, Hearts Are Actually Butts

Posted by on March 17, 2016 at 2:50 PM

Okay, I was over by the lake and I walked by this leaf smashed into the sidewalk and it was a heart. And not just sort-of-heart-shaped, but PERFECT, like spray it pink and slap it on some dumb plastic shit at Walgreen's on Feb 14 and you wouldn't look twice. Just as iconographics go historically, we take stuff from nature and then sort of match-cut and use metaphor and symbols to define things, but then you figure, leaves had to be way more heart-shaped than hearts, especially once people started dissecting stuff and figured out what hearts LOOKED like. And then, if anything, you wouldn't even have said it looked like a tree-leaf, you would have to say it looked more like, what, a potato, right? What the hell else does a human heart look like in nature if not a potato?


Anyway, this made me sad because it feels like humanity missed a beautiful opportunity for our shorthand phrase to be "I [potato] you."

Categories: Absolutely Fucking True Stories, Arbitrary Ruminations

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